


Still Here

by pipermca



Category: Transformers (IDW 2019), Transformers - All Media Types
Genre: Drabble, Established Relationship, F/F, Giving permission to leave, Implied Body Horror, Look one of them is being absorbed by the planet and the other is a giant metal squeegee, Loss of body doesn't necessarily mean death, Tags Are Hard, The metaphysics are weird here, Till All Are One, Two old ladies loving each other the best way they can
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-17
Updated: 2019-06-17
Packaged: 2020-05-13 20:04:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19258243
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pipermca/pseuds/pipermca
Summary: It was so easy to get lost in the voices of the planet. But there was one for whom she waited.She promised she would wait as long as she could.





	Still Here

It was so easy to get lost in the voices of the planet.

And she did lose herself sometimes, falling into the whispers and the murmurs of the myriad of lifeforms that made up the fabric of the world. Days would pass – or maybe it was centuries - while she listened, letting herself drift in the rumbles and the sighs rippling through the crust, hearing the chorus of the metal around her.

But she always drew herself back. She did not want to lose herself completely, not yet. When she had decided to go immersant, it was something that she needed to do for herself. She wanted the extra data, she wanted to slip into the seams of the crust. She wanted to transcend the limited form in which she had been forged. She wanted to forget some of what she knew, and she wanted to know more than she could as just herself. Once she became one with Cybertron, she would gain and lose all of that. 

But there was one for whom she waited. She promised she would wait as long as she could. 

There was always the hope that maybe they could slip away together.

Each time she pulled back into herself, it became more difficult: separating herself from what she was becoming, pulling loose the threads in which she was becoming entwined. The will to keep herself separate was fading, weakened by the changes in the harmony of the planet around her. Something was wrong, and it wore at her. The urge to let herself fall deeper, to let herself drift further, to let herself become one with the body of the world around her, was compelling. 

She was not sure how much longer she could wait. But she had promised. 

Mechs came to see her from time to time, asking for guidance, asking for advice, asking for wisdom, or sometimes just seeking a face to speak at, a silent sounding board for their ideas. She roused herself when she felt she was needed, bringing her consciousness back to the surface. But more and more often, she took note of her visitors but did not acknowledge them.

It was so hard to speak now. Each word was an effort. Drawing herself out of the planet was a chore. 

Orion Pax came to her. Or would he come to her in the future? She was not sure; the flow of time felt mutable and uncertain. But he came/would come, asking for guidance on how to proceed, asking for permission to act on his suspicions. They spoke/would speak, and she answered/would answer him as best she could.

Then he left, and she allowed herself/would allow herself to sink back down into the thrum and the rhythms of the planet around her.

She waited.

_Codexa? Are you still there?_

The words came to her through the substance of the planet, transmitted through the living metal that she was being subsumed into. She stirred, recognizing the voice, and replied.

 _I am still here, Leviathan._

Love and concern trickled down through the metal, bathing her in the forge-feeder’s emotions. _I am glad that you are still here, but... You do not need to wait for me._

The old argument, the ancient squabble, words practiced over centuries. Or was this the first time they were having this conversation? She could not remember. All she knew was that this was a familiar dance.

 _I know that I do not need to wait._ She let herself fall a bit more into the planet, sending her care to the surface, where the large metal skimmer sat above her chamber. _But I said that I would, for as long as I could. So I am still here._

Mild exasperation, coloured with her old lover’s affection. _How does it go? What have you heard?_

She faltered then, loathe to admit what she already knew. But this was one from whom she could hide nothing. _The song is changing, Leviathan. The song is splintering. I do not know how much longer I can listen._

Sadness, then. _I know. Things are happening. Bad things are coming._ A tiredness. _If it is too hard, if you can't listen any more, you do not need to wait for me, Codexa._

 _I know that I do not need to wait._ Had she said this before? Surely she had. Or maybe this was the first time she was saying it. Either way, it needed to be said. _But I will wait until I can no longer bear to listen to the disharmony, old friend. I said that I would wait for you._

_I remember._ Another brush of love, another quiet sigh of grief. _I have to go now. I have more to do._

 _Yes. I can hear them calling to you._ She knew that Leviathan would need to move off again soon, leaving her side. The forges were always hungry, even with so few new mechs being forged now. _Do your work. Do your part to bring more voices to the song. Maybe one of them will bring harmony back to the chorus._

Above her, she heard Leviathan’s engine start up again. _Take care, my love. And if you need to go without me... Go. I will understand._

 _I will. I promise._ She relaxed back into the warm grip of the living metal around her, feeling herself fade just a bit more. _But I will wait for you as long as I can._

Silence fell, then, and she allowed herself to become lost once more in the voices of the planet. 

**Author's Note:**

> Codexa got under my skin from the first time I saw her in the rebooted IDW comics. I don't know why. I think it might be the _Ghost in the Shell_ aesthetic to how she was drawn. In any event, I knew I needed to write something with her in it, and then this happened.
> 
> If you liked this fic, please consider sharing it on [Tumblr](https://pipermca.tumblr.com/post/185667457392/still-here), [Twitter](https://twitter.com/pipermca/status/1182413826219749377), or [Pillowfort](https://www.pillowfort.social/posts/712308)!


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